Confidence: The Superpower You Can Develop (Without Buying a Yacht You Can’t Sail)

B. Shiv Kumar
4 min readMar 16, 2023

I had the pleasure of meeting my brother and while catching up with him, we somehow hit the topic of confidence. Call us crazy, but we had a conversation for about five hours on confident people and how someone is perceived as confident. I mean, what better can we do on a Sunday evening?

The Ultimate Secret to Success: Hint, it’s not a yacht.

Confidence is an emotion all of us desire. After all, why not? Confident people get things done. They are seen as charismatic. They are seen as the go getters who are daring and capable of anything. At work, it’s usually the confident people who are seen as reliable and they get promoted easily. Confidence is the ultimate secret to success. It’s like a secret superpower that only a lucky few possess. But fear not, dear reader, as confidence can be developed through some simple and practical steps.

A confident looking person.

Confidence: like coffee, but stronger

Confidence is not about strutting around like a peacock and showing off to the world. It’s about being comfortable with who you are, what you can do, and what you can’t. It’s about acknowledging your strengths and weaknesses and not being afraid to ask for help when you need it. Confidence is like the perfect pair of shoes that fit you just right, making you feel comfortable and confident in your own skin.

Confidence and Failure: How to handle life’s curveballs

Confidence is often associated with success, and it is commonly assumed that individuals who are prosperous in their lives possess confidence. However, life is unpredictable, and one may experience multiple setbacks, such as a failed business venture, a cheating partner, or termination from their job. Despite the uncontrollable circumstances, one can choose their response to adversity. As the saying goes,

“You can’t control what happens to you, but you can choose how you respond to it.”

This is the foundation of confidence. Instead of succumbing to self-doubt and despair, one can choose to analyze the situation, identify their mistakes, and take steps to ensure that similar incidents do not happen in the future. In summary, confidence is rooted in one’s response to adversity, and by choosing a constructive response, individuals can build their self-assurance.

Tips to develop confidence: Because no one wants to be a wallflower forever

Ok great. You have defined what you think is confidence. Now how can one develop it? Good question. Although not exhaustive, here I’ve listed what I believe are some steps to achieving confidence:

  • Take care of yourself: Taking care of yourself is the one of the easiest ways to develop confidence. Exercise well. Eat healthy food. Dress well. Groom yourself well. Sleep well. You’ll automatically feel good, which will boost your confidence.
Taking care of yourself boosts confidence.
  • Accept that failure is a natural part of life: Your life can and will go horribly wrong at multiple points. It’s your response to these failures that defines who you are and how confident you are. You can see failure as end of the road, or you can see failure as a way to correct course. Be kind and gentle with yourself when you make mistakes or fail. After all, you’re only human, and no one is perfect. Unless you’re Doge, of course. Doge is perfect.
Doge is the ultimate confident creature.
  • Be comfortable with your insecurities and flaws: You need to accept yourself for who you are. That means taking a long, hard look in the mirror and saying, “Hey, I’m not perfect, but that’s okay.” Once you’ve accepted your flaws and all, you can start to set realistic goals for yourself. Charisma comes from accepting yourself. Don’t aim for the stars if you can barely jump off the ground.
  • Understand your environment and behave responsibly: Hurting people because it looks cool or speeding on the highway because #YOLO is stupidity. Taking responsibility and behaving responsibly brings order to your life, which automatically makes you confident.

Find the Balance and Avoid Buying a Yacht You Can’t Sail

So, there you have it, folks. Confidence is like a cool breeze on a hot summer day or a warm blanket on a cold winter night. It’s something that we all deserve, and it’s something that we can all achieve with a little bit of effort and a lot of self-love. Just don’t let it go to your head, or you might end up like that guy who won the lottery and bought a yacht, but forgot to learn how to sail. It’s all about finding a balance between being confident in yourself and staying grounded and humble.

I guess you could say the conversation I had with my brother was fruitful.



B. Shiv Kumar

A curious soul interested about Machine Learning and life in general.